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Jul. 14th, 2009

WE've been apart for two weeks and as the old saying goes time apart makes the heart goes fonder. And in my case it did. It made me long for days when i would be home with our daughter and you would come over and we would be a real familly for two small hours. Although yes it is some time it still feels like nothing. Infact it makes me want you more. I love when you come over and spend time with clem and I. I love to watch you play with our daughter as i cook or clean. It makes me want to tell you that I love you, although you already know that. I realize that our relationship is not functional but it is one that we have been having for siz years now on and off. It seems that what keeps us together is the sex. And the rare cuddling. I wish that you would live with me and clem and we could be a familly. I mean you give it to val, I want to be a familly with you and our daughter.

Today you came over and we had an argument for about 2 hours and then you called me val. I mean thats fucked up. I never called you someone else's name!!! I slammed the door so hard and it resonated in the building then i called you back up to kiss goodbye. I mean how sick is that? but thats how we work.
You said that I would hate you if we lived together, But you so easily forget I did live with you, I didnt hate you. We had issues because you were the breadwinner and I was the stay at home "wife" and when you would come home you only wanted to play videogames, and not go out. I mean atleast now I feel thatI would look at things differntly atleast for the next 4 weeks. I would have a purpose. To take care of our daughter cook and clean for all three of us and be able to cuddle up next to you at night. I miss you. I wish you were with me and clem right now.

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